Remember When?

It’s a running joke with some of my friends about how I have a horrible memory. Many times I refer to Lori to help me remember things. People say that sometimes we choose not to remember certain parts of our lives to help protect ourselves. I’m not completely sold on that theory. There are a lot of events in my life that are forgotten. If I didn’t have my sister to remind me I would think I didn’t have a childhood b/c there is so much of it that is empty to me. But there are many current events that I can’t recall as well. What frustrates me is that the times I want to remember, I can’t. And some memories I do have, I wish I could erase. Not so much erase them so that they didn’t happen but just so I am not tortured by them. They’re not even bad memories but they just cause thoughts & feelings to resurface. Thoughts & feelings that you’d think wouldn’t still be lingering in the air. I wish I knew how this whole process worked. I wish I had a memory filing cabinet. And if I wanted to go back and revisit certain times, then I could go to the filing cabinet and take it out and “remember the good ol’ days”. But until then, I’d like to keep some things locked away. How exactly do you “take every thought captive”? I haven’t figured that one out yet.

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